2005 Season - Broomleys - 2005/08/07
Jez writes:
The match against Broomleys was, in many ways, a pretty typical Dorchester affair. To the uniniated spectator, the young, athletic and highly enthusiastic set of lads that was Broomleys Sunday XI were bound to prove too much for the assortment of flabby, injury-prone lay-abouts that populate our team in such number. But only the uniniated would draw such a premature conclusion, for what we may lack in agility, we more than make up for with experience, guile and, where necessary, shrewd psychological comment.
Benno kicked the mind games off by arriving purposely late, attired in some hideous pink and purple tank top which must have alarmed several Broomleys fielders. But such "assistance" from the boundary proved unnecessary as the Dorchester openers, Jez and Mark Brennan, got things off to a steady start.
We had 36 on the board when Mark was out and Smudger arrived at the crease, elevated in the batting order in light of the fact that 3 of the regular top 5 were absent. Smudge carried on Mark’s earlier good work and clattered 9 boundaries in his 48, which included one swipe over square leg that particularly upset their young seamer. Much chuntering about "proper cricket shots" could be heard as the poor lad sloped off towards the end of his run.
Broomleys didn’t help themselves by dropping several straightforward catches and this encouraged our boys, now batting with more freedom, to get stuck into the loopy off-spin from the far end. Jez went to 50 with a six over long on, which surprised him as much as those watching, and after 28-overs things were looking rosy at 153 for 1.
Crossy arrived at the crease after Smudge’s dismissal and helped push the score on to 192 for 2. When Jez was stumped, the lads decided to lighten proceedings somewhat with some comedy batting. Andy Highton was out for 4; Rich Brown, keen to show off his new bat to the assembled onlookers, was caught first ball at cover and Mr Cross Senior and Mr Brown Senior managed one paltry run between them. 192 - 2 became 217 - 8 and it was left to Benno, now sporting more neutral colours, to carve the last 2-balls of the innings to the boundary, the second of these being hit with utter contempt - Benno clearly displeased about having to trudge out to the middle for a mere 30-seconds of glory.
We finished on 225, which was decent but not awesome given that the track was playing nicely and the outfield lightning quick.
Before taking the field, the lads tucked into tea with great alacrity - baked potatoes, various fillings, cold meats, strawberry cheese cake and ice cream. A tremendous effort by Broomleys’ tea ladies and a clear incentive for a slot on next season’s fixture list!
Broomleys got off to a good start with their opener biffing one of Gaunty’s early deliveries into the hedge for six. However, wickets fell regularly, AG picking up one, Rich Brown two and Benno one. With a little over a hundred on the board and half the overs gone, we were definitely in control.
A suitable opportunity, therefore, for Mick Stewardson to teach these youngsters a thing or two about fielding. The Vicar had cleverly hoodwinked the opposition earlier in the day by putting down a couple of chances and so it was a confident, if somewhat naive, batsman that called for a quick single to Mick fielding at mid-wicket. An effortless swoop, pick-up and shy at the stumps, which he hit full on, saw their batter run out by a country mile. A definite contender for the day’s Champagne / Sparkling Wine moment.
Much celebration followed... apart from by their umpire, who had copped a nasty one between the legs when Mick’s throw ricocheted off the stumps and caught him unawares.
Several of our chaps gathered round the poor unfortunate, now blubbing in a heap on the edge of the square. The willingness to offer inappropriate suggestions and the reluctance to administer emergency first aid were apparent in equal measure.
At the beginning of the next over, the new batsman enquired of the afflicted umpire (who was still clutching his goolies in a pitiful manner), "Two, umpire?". It wasn’t entirely clear whether this was a query about his personal wellbeing or a request for a middle and leg stump guard. Needless to say, their ump saw out that over and promptly wobbled off in the direction of the pavilion. Marvellous.
By this stage, we had the game pretty much wrapped up, Mick having taken another 3-wickets to add to this season’s haul, and there was opportunity for Mr Cross Senior and Mr Brown Senior to show their worth with the ball. A collective effort of 2-overs, 1 for 5 compensated somewhat for the earlier batting and had it not been for Mark’s dodgy over, which disappeared for twenty, we would have won by more.
Nonetheless, we had plenty of runs in hand when they were all out for 174 and a suitably high-spirited team left the field having chalked up win number 6 of the season.